4 prompts

Journal prompt: what am I actually grieving?

Grief after a breakup is rarely one thing wearing one face. This prompt takes the ache apart so you can see what's actually in it.

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How to use these

When a relationship ends you lose several things at once: a person, a routine, a future, and an idea of yourself. Undifferentiated, that lands as one enormous unfixable feeling. Named separately, each piece becomes something you can respond to.

The prompts

  1. 01If I could keep only one thing from that relationship, what would it be — and why that?

    Why it works: You won't feel the same way again — you'll feel a different way, with more information. Sameness was never what made it good.

  2. 02Write three lists, ten minutes

    Why it works: What I miss about him. What I miss about my life with him. What I miss about who I was with him. Don't tidy them; the messy list is the honest one.

  3. 03Circle what's recoverable

    Why it works: Most of column two and nearly all of column three can be rebuilt without him. Mark those — that's your next month.

  4. 04Read it back in a week

    Why it works: Same prompt, new page, no rereading first. The drift between the two is progress you'd otherwise never notice.

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One book, ninety days, a page for every night — the prompts on this page are the free sample of it.

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Questions women ask

How long should I spend on this prompt?

Ten to fifteen minutes. Long enough to get past the polite answers, short enough that you don't spiral.

What if writing makes me feel worse?

A short dip during and a lift afterwards is normal. If it stays heavy for hours, shorten the sessions and do them earlier in the day.

Do I need to write every day?

No. Three times a week beats a daily streak you abandon in a fortnight.

Talk to a human

Write Kris today.

Tell her where you are right now — one honest paragraph is enough. She reads every message herself.

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Kris Kay, founder of breakupeasy

Written by Kris Kay

Breakup coach and founder of breakupeasy — she has spent years walking women through the part nobody prepares you for. More about Kris